Jealousy

At what point in my life did I realize that other people have things that I want? Self-confidence, coordination, ambition, etc.

When I came to the realization that there are people who are better than me, at oh so many things, part of me gave up. I will never be as smart as them, as well liked, as happy. I am a pessimist from way back.

I no longer feel so hopeless. Experience has taught me that many people are not as well off as the seem, which is very sad. Experience has also taught me that yes many people are better than me at many things, but I can close the gap. At least in some areas.

I am already much happier and mentally and physically healthier than I used to be, just think how much better I can be if I stick around for a few more decades!

“At least I’ve got my health,” that thing that all the old people say, it is so true. Your health and someone who loves you, that’s all you really need.

I think I am going to age well. I am going to be one of those old ladies who sees past all the bull shit and is perfectly happy if she can drink ice tea and has hideous drawings from children to put on her fridge.

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